Last year I unfortunately injured my left knee while hiking in Arizona with a couple travel friends. The orthopedic surgeon I visited Thursday suspects it's "patello-femoral syndrome," which is technical jargon for "messed-up knee cap." He literally crossed his fingers when I asked if physical therapy would solve the problem. (How very reassuring.)
Upon my questioning what I could do to supplement PT, he asked me about my weight. Punch one.
A purely scientific, mathematical question, the purpose behind it only to benefit me as an athlete in the upcoming ride. I told him that I'm in the process of trying to lose some pounds, kidding that "just as I wouldn't go for a jog around the block with a backpack full of bricks strapped to me, it doesn't make sense to cycle across the continent with extra body fat." And then he concurred. Punch two.
Knockout in the ring. I was down for the count.
I guess I was hoping to hear from him what my girlfriends always say: "What? You don't need to lose weight!" or "You're in great shape! Why would you ever consider dieting?" But that's not what I got. And as much as my brain knew that Doc only had my best interest in mind, it still hurt. To receive confirmation from another that there is in fact something about you physically that needs improvement... well. It's not all that esteem-boosting.
I'm conscious that I am not fat, but I am aware that I do have some gut to lose. The knowledge of that should - SHOULD - be easy to digest. Yet the above scenario reminded me how sensitive I can be at even a medical professional's confirmation that what I already know to be true, is.
My question to you, dearest reader is: How do you separate yourself from your body? How do you step on a bathroom scale and let the numbers represent nothing more than an arbitrary measurement? Any woman in western society knows why we react to the issue of kilos in such touchy manners: media, industry, meanly targeted marketing, etc. But how do we detach ourselves from it? Please comment, I'd like to hear everyone's opinion.