Hi everyone! After a week in New York, I am now back in Princeton meeting up with friends and settling back in for my senior year.
Sarah admits in her blog her fairy tale hope of meeting a really nice guy through this "public deflowering" project. Some of you have already commented that if what she wants is a nice guy who is interested in HER, her current project is certainly counterproductive. I agree with this, and would add the following. Let's look beyond the immediate situation at hand. Let's look ahead to when she does find “the one,” the one she would like to spend a life with, the one she would like to make a family with.
Is it fair to her future husband and future children to put herself out like this?
I read a statistic this summer, while I was working at the Heritage Foundation under Patrick Fagan, that having just one sexual partner other than one’s spouse decreases one’s chances of having a stable marriage from 80% to about 54%*
While the dating field might look rather bleak now, Sarah’s chances of having a stable, happy marriage when she does find the one are really, really good. Few people have such odds in their favor. She should hold on to that…not only for her own good, but for the good of her future husband and children.
What are all people ultimately looking for in relationships and in sex? They are looking for happiness, a sense of connecting with another human being. Well, if she wants true happiness and a true and lasting connection with another man, she should wait for when that man, her future husband, comes along.
*Robert E Rector, Kirk A Johnson, Lauren R Noyes, Shannan Martin, The Harmful Effects of Early Sexual Activity And Multiple Sexual Partners Among Women: A Book of Charts, Chart 15, The Heritage Foundation, June 2003