The Allure of the Stripper

Beauty magazines may be a limited lens with which to view the culture, but they can be, at times, quite revealing. Last month Allure ran a letter from its editor wherein she discussed the ability to flirt and be alluring  to the opposite sex. Getting the topic off the ground, she reminisced about that girl in junior high who just KNEW the right way to flip her hair-- the one that most of the girls were dying to imitate.

In order to further her knowledge (to be shared with you, dear reader) of this innate, hair-flipping, allure-ability, the editor and a few of her colleagues decided the thing to do would be to interview strippers-- sorry, exotic dancers-- at a well-known "gentleman's club". Because these gals get paid to turn men on, they figured, they must really know all the right moves. And so they did, joined by a few gents in order to make sure the act really did produce the desired results, and was therefore worthy of imitation. There followed, in the editor's letter, some of the tips the dancers shared.

I found this astonishing and yet terribly dreary. The advice of the women who can enlighten us the least is held up as the gold standard; the sterile, professional's base of knowledge becomes that which we all should emulate. Their approach-- which elicits the predictable, common, purchased response of men in strip clubs-- should be our ideal of how to attract a man. And for what purpose? The editor didn't elaborate.

I don't think she really meant for her readers to step up the ladder to professional tease or, for the really ambitious, prostitute. And while she does sign off with the acknowledgment that this type of seduction is "cartoonish, a collection of mannerisms", I believe this is commonly known as "speaking out of both sides on one's mouth." "True sexiness is innate, guileless, unaffected", she says. Fascinating, yes. But then why make the effort to take not one but twenty colleagues to spend their precious time investigating the strip club technique? Did it really take the interview for them to come to this rather obvious conclusion?

And never mind the indecency of it. Slighted no less than their brains were women's hearts and souls. It was nothing but this shallow, sexual aspect of their lives on exhibit, and held up as praiseworthy. The beauty and depth and mystery of the things that attract men to women were simply ignored. So doesn't this reduce attraction, and consequently all women, to the level of a business transaction?

I know, I know-- it's just a magazine, and a magazine that is dedicated to beauty and fashion tips is hardly the place to look for an in-depth guide to enhancing one's inner beauty, much less the meaning of attraction between the sexes. But must we really reduce the power of a woman to attract and seduce a  man to this? To her ability to initiate a Pavlovian physiological response? We should be emphasizing the remarkable power of a woman over a man in this context--power that comprises much more than just the physical.

So why do we all just shrug?

Comments

[christine]

I'm so sick of this kind of thing.

Enough already!

[Lori]

I think in general, women are interested in this sort of thing out of curiosity more than anything. I went to a male strip club many years ago and just didn't find it that entertaining. A couple of guy friends of mine went to a strip club, too, and they weren't entertained, either.

The whole thing is portrayed as being glamorous and edgy. Looking at them from the outside, I can think of only one "gentlemen's club" that looks high-end. All the others I've driven past in town look like dives. Despite all the buzz, I don't think it has long-term appeal for average Janes and Joes.

[R.B.]

Do we need ideals for how to attract a man at all? My life has been much easier since I gave up on that crap. So far, it hasn't had any negative effects on my romantic life. My general impression is that most of you modesty people are either married or better-looking than me or both, so you must need that crap even less than I do.

"Slighted no less than their brains were women's hearts and souls."

Just to object to one possible reading of this: I don't think that being compared to a stripper should be considered a slight to anyone's brain. Lots of women are sex workers because they need to pay their bills, not because they're brainless bimbos. (Of course, Allure does insult its readers' intelligence by advising them to cater to men's every whim* without expecting to get anything out of it themselves. I assume that's the reading you actually intended.)

*Or every supposed whim, really. It's not like they know what anybody's whims are, except for the two or three men Allure bothered to ask. For fashion magazines, all men are probably interchangeable.

[Nene]

It's amazing how much crap is put out there for women to read and "learn" from. I agree that this article was put there to satisfy ppl's curiosity- the "how DO you attract a man?" curiosity. But by pretending to be a stripper??? hmmmm . . . most girls I know are not aspiring to be strippers although it's hard to tell by the late-night, party antics of some. Nontheless, the answer that Allure gives to satisfy this natural curiosity is ludicrous.

[ellen]

I don't look at *any* periodical, especially one of "Allure" genre, as "...just a magazine." No source of trash can be considered benign or deserves to be swept into a quiet corner. Any form of media makes an impact, adhering itself to our Selves in some manner, large or small, for better or worse.

Magazines, including those which serve up "Allure" fare, are media which can make a lasting imprint on readers. They touch the young and impressionable (with filthy hands, in the case of the 'Stripper' article). It is these especially susceptible readers, who, I believe, are most likely to purchase the "Allure" brand of periodicals put out on the market.

Whether or not an article is wholesome, taking us places we ought to go, ...or base and voyeuristic, engaging us in base exercises for our "benefit" (so we don't have go to the trouble of exploring the stripper lifestyle and its "tips" ourselves), the content makes its tracks across our souls, either polluting or uplifting us. Even a curious browse through media's degrading fare only adds weight to the heap of scrap which society (often, with our own consent) has piled in our minds.

We know from the get-go that nothing wholesome is to be gained from articles such as the one described in the above post. Magazines which include such pieces take us to places and introduce us to perversions which we don't need to explore.

These media tours are not benign. They have the ability to impede us in our quest for modesty. They lead others away from even seeking this goal. They attempt to erode our quest for innocence and send they who are not yet wise enough to cherish such goals down futile roads.

Whatever kind of spin is put on media trash...serious or silly..., we must take it seriously. Whatever "box" refuse comes in...magazine, T.V., radio, etc..., it is our business to undermine it.

Ellen

[Jderser]

[not such a big surprise to me]