I'm sort of stuck somewhere. That place between knowing what you want and having no idea. My convictions and values are the same, but there's a fork in the road, and there are no metal signs that point to Safety or to Danger.
I should clarify what the dilemma is, of course. It is the confusion that every looking-for-love single faces: Am I dating for fun - as an extracurricular? Or am I dating to find The One? I thought for awhile that they can both be done at once, but now I deeply question that fusion.
Field V, my very excellent friend, told us about the phrase "deal breaker." It means what it sounds like, used as dating terminology. For example, I've always told myself that any man in whom I develop remote interest should have faith in God and a strong affinity for church fellowship. Were I to meet a man seemingly 'perfect' in every other respect but who had no design to ever set foot in a sanctuary, it'd be a deal breaker: a no-go.
Figuring out what your deal breakers are is more difficult than it seems. Depends on how much of a romantic you are, I say, and whether or not you believe in a soulmate: a perfect fit for you. What are your deal breakers? Would you be opposed to a first date with someone who hates cats even though you adore them? An individual with less education than yourself? Much more education? A member of the political party opposite your own? A smoker, though you despise cigarettes? Is it a waste of your time (and his/hers) by going out even once, if you have a negative premonition?
At 21 years old, should I be dating for fun? or with long-term intentions? Am I too young to adopt a deal breaker policy? If pursued by a suitor in whom I note one or more traits or habits that I had in the past always considered deal breakers, do I flat out refuse invites? Or accept them, and give the dude a chance? I've been counseled by friends both ways.
What, dear blog reader, is your advice? As a junior in college, how do I regard the dating scene? Lightly? Or long-term? Am I waiting for marriage material only? Or is that too heavy for my current situation/place in life?